Pacificmelody's Blog

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Elegy For My Soul

dream_by_taenaron-d34q599 I Will Find You

Don’t you hear the music
I can hear it playing
Running through my mind
A million miles an hour

The air is full of flowers
The kind that bloom at night
In warm and sultry climates
In lush profusion

And then of course
The memories come calling
It is my curse
That I cannot forget

It is my blessing
That once I truly had you
As I will always have you
Here inside my heart

And though we’d parted ways
And though the years
Were spent apart with
Contact at a minimum

Still news of your death
Struck me like a sword blow
I’ve never felt such pain
I did not even comprehend

That pain on such a level
Was anything but myth
I had grieved before
But not like this

Not like this

For still you are in
My blood my bone
My heart my very soul
And I am yours
Until the day I die

Until the day I die


What Will We Leave Our Children

beautiful-love-natureAs vile as we
Are beautiful ~
Still ~
I think the
Human race ~
Has earned the
To go on ~

If you judge us
As a whole ~
And not by the
Evil causes
We’ve espoused
From time to time ~

The great majority ~
Though not as
As it once was ~
Is made up
Of those
Just like us ~

Who want the
Same things ~
Feel the same
Emotions ~
Bleed the same
Color ~

Can we not try ~
Here in this
Eleventh hour ~
To choose what
Is best
For us All ~

Will you not
Join together ~
So that our
Will have
Air to breathe ~

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A Tribute to Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

Dr Wayne W DyerAh so that is why
The Universe felt empty
For a moment
When I awoke today

This world contained
Your earthly presence
And then
In a heartbeat
It did not

And we are poorer
For your loss
But we are richer
Still by far
Because you lived
Among us
Shared our struggles
In the trenches
And spread the knowledge
That you gained there
With joyous generosity

And I have lost a friend

Although we never met
Here in the flesh
Your heart and mind
Have spoken to me
In the place where
Hearts and minds can
Meet and mingle and
Complete each other

And so my friend
I celebrate your life
And I congratulate you
On your graduation

Have fun!


To A Soul Mate

Goddess of the HearthYou are the goddess
Of the hearth
Of my heart
You are the standard
By which I judge
The warmth
Of my welcome
The joy my
Arrival brings

Time and its passage
Are matters of
Little importance
To those such as
You and I
Who have known
Each other in
Countless lifetimes
Before and shall
Know one another
Countless lifetimes

We are part of the
Group Soul
A glimpse of the
And you are a
Part of my soul

It is our destiny


What Brings Me Joy

rhododendron blossomBurn bright oh blessed light of day ~
Who chases all the foolish
Fears of night away ~

It dazzles me sometimes
The beauty of all life
That you reveal ~
Especially in springtime ~

The tender green
The freshness of it all ~
The dawning of renewed hope ~

The sheer perfection
Of one single floweret
From a rhododendron blossom ~
Out of all the blossoms
In the Universe ~
Simply rocks my senses ~
And brings me
Close to tears of joy ~

These are the moments that
I live for ~


Beauty and Madness


I’ve opened my heart and the words are flowing flowing in time to the desperate beauty of the music and the night and the utter inevitability of it all meeting you here loving you losing you how could I tell it was our one and only chance out of all time to find each other but I won’t accept it can’t believe it it must be a nightmare from which I’ll awaken and soon oh god I can’t bear the loss the pain the terror of never holding you again of never feeling that soul-deep connection only you and I achieved out of a night more wondrous than all the other nights before in a world with everything to offer and nothing to be gained without you my thoughts are in a constant whirl and the earth moves in small tremors underneath my feet I’ve heard of losing your mind and I wonder if this is how it feels and then I pull myself together and look for a plan any plan any motion anything but nothing at all I can’t slow down long enough for the pain to catch me must outrun it stay ahead of the fear and the panic hold onto my wits for someday I’ll need them again have to find you can’t stop running can’t stop thinking where would I go if I were the most wonderful person in the world on the run from me and again my mind whirs and the numbers fly by and no conclusion is reached I check my phone again no missed calls no messages no hope no time to think no hope keep my spirits up keep on thinking don’t stop moving go to every place we’ve ever been call all your friends and mine put in a missing persons report no it’s too soon or too late I can no longer tell can you hear me can you feel me can you feel my pain and regret and the heavy heart that carries the burden of my stupidity and loss and pain I will find you again I will there is that your face your hair your car your walk no just another stranger gaping at my mad behavior and on and on I go and every face I search belongs to someone not you and still I will search and I will find you hear me call you hear my call hear my cries feel my love which is stronger than my silly brain forgive me and forget my sins and take me back and it will be as once it was between us as pure and innocent and perfect as the dawn and we will be together forever Oh come back come back take me back don’t you know how much I love you there are are there you are is it a mirage or are you really there I’m melting no I’m fainting no I’m saved by you.

(Originally published August 7, 2011.)


Dream of Tree

11bad7675febd6b027627f43965ce2f9 Woman to Tree

When I am close to dying
I will go and stand
In the forest

I will put down roots
As I watch the mossy green
Begin to trace its way
From toe tips to ankles
And higher
Though I still do not know
Which way is North

As my skin begins
To harden ‘neath
The sun and rain and
Stormy winds
My arms and fingers
Long have gone for
Limbs and twigs

In Spring they will sprout
With blossoms
Then with tender leaves
They will bear within their
Sheltering branches nests
Full of beauty and of song

Just so might I stand
For centuries
Or perish from a single
Stroke of lightening
In a single night

But either way
I will have lived my dream


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